Plastic Christmas Trees
Well, we’re here in Minnesota, transplants from California and,
boy, are things different! First of all, I was told by an unofficial source
that 90% of Minnesotans use artificial Christmas trees for the holidays. I
would’ve thought more people would use real trees. After all, there are pine
trees everywhere; perfectly symmetrical (yes I did say that in an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice) beautiful, natural pine trees just asking to be chopped down and loaded with lights and tinsel and year-old candy canes. Perhaps it’s a conservation thing, but my theory is they just take pine trees for granted. In Southern California, pine trees are mostly in the mountains, so I have a romantic view of them. But if you think about it, wouldn’t you rather have a plastic tree
than, say, a plastic nose? (That’s a joke related to all the plastic surgeries
in L.A. which I probably didn’t need to tell you, but my family often doesn’t
“get” my humor, so now I’m explaining it which probably means it’s not very funny).
Hot You’re Cold So Cold You’re Hot
If you’re following the obscure English Beat song reference of this sub-title, keep reading; otherwise you are one of those people who doesn’t “get” me. Anyway, what I really want to talk about is temperature control. When we lived in California, we kept the house heated to 72-degrees in the winter, which is a 22-degree difference between outside and inside when it’s 50 degrees outside. (Yes, that’s winter in So Cal!). But, apparently my body doesn’t like extreme
changes in temperature, so even though I keep the heat lower here, at 68 degrees, I am still prone to SAS or Sweaty Armpit Syndrome whenever I come in. But if I tried to keep the temperature difference at 22 when it’s 18 degrees here, I would have to cool my house to 40 degrees (that’s 18 plus 22, well, you get the point!). I guess I’ll just have to get “Minnesota tough.” I learned about that after “Minnesota nice,” and now I’m confused. Am I supposed to be nice or tough, or nice and tough? Do I dress for the outside or inside or somewhere in between?
White is the New Brown
After the first big storm at the end of November, I thought
the snow was amazing and beautiful! The whole world turned white and shimmery
and otherworldly. It was like moving to a new place without actually moving,
which I just did, so you see my reluctance to do it again. So this was great! I
was getting really tired of the drab browns and greys of the Southern
California desert. And now, a month later it’s still white. So, white is the
new brown, except when it’s brown which is the day after it snows, and the sand
they lay on the roads for traction, and dirt from the cars mixes into a gooey
brown mess. Then brown is the new brown. My point is that you can have too much of a good thing, even white sugary beautiful snow. I know what you’re thinking, it’s only the beginning of winter, boy is this girl in trouble! Will she
survive the swirling mud pit? Will Robin be able to save her on time? Oh, sorry that’s Batman. Well, I am from LA and was weaned on steady diet of TV and movies so what can I say. I’ve probably said too much already. You’ll just have to stay tuned, to see if I can be Minnesota tough, or at least tough enough to survive my first winter.